Does travel with your teenager seem like more stress than it’s worth? These tips will help your family travel successfully with teens.
Teenagers are moody, notoriously difficult to please and often unwilling to spend time with their families. So is it possible for a family to travel successfully when there is a teenager in their midst? I think it is - as long as you keep the following five tips in mind.
1. Consult Them
During the planning stage it is crucial to discuss the options with your teenager. Think about their interests, ask them about their preferences and let them make some choices about what the family will do while on vacation. In short, if you get them to buy-in to the plans up-front then they are less likely to complain about activities during the vacation.
2. Give Them Some Privacy
Whenever possible, choose accommodations that will afford your teenager some measure of privacy. We have found that as our older daughter has entered her tween and teenage years it has become more important to have suite or apartment style accommodations so that she can separate and not have to spend every waking minute with us. Having separate bedrooms and a living area will also allow a teenager to sleep in a bit while other members of the family get up and get ready for the day. Sometimes that little extra bit of sleep can make all the difference in the world to the mood for the day.
3. Be Smart About Scheduling
Wise parents need to realize that teenagers have different sleep patterns than everyone else in the family and schedule activities accordingly. If you plan too many activities to start early in the morning then you are just asking for a miserable teenager. Planning for a later start to the day, when possible, will increase the likelihood that your teenager will be more cooperative on the days when you have no choice but to get up and get moving.
4. Remember that Electronics Can Be Your Friend
Don't ban electronics all together. Yes, in an ideal world your teenager will be engaging with their family and enjoying their vacation destination without having to resort to iPods or laptops, however, that's just more than most of us can realistically hope for. Sometimes a bit of time spent on Facebook chatting with friends at home, sharing a photo on Instagram or just sitting quietly listening to music may be all it takes to ensure that your teenager remains happy.
5. Encourage Socializing
Vacations like cruising or staying at resorts lend themselves easily to meeting other teenagers and socializing. Encourage your teen to get out and meet other kids their age whenever that possibility exists. Hanging out with new friends is infinitely more fun than hanging out with uncool family members - let them and it will buy you much needed goodwill. An even better option, when possible, is to bring a friend along on your travels – with a built-in companion you can almost guarantee a happy teen for the duration of the trip.
Having a teenager doesn't mean that you need to stop traveling. I find that it is actually easier for everyone to get along on vacation when the stresses of day to day life (like nagging about homework and tidying the bedroom) have been removed from the equation. Keep these tips in mind and your vacation should go much more smoothly.
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Lisa Wood
fantastic tips! We are travelling with two teenagers and it can be either very peaceful or very full-on! Sleep is a huge thing – if they get enough sleep then they are happier and so is the whole family!
Such a great tip about planning – asking our boys what they would like to do helps and makes for a nicer time out.
Joanna
Great post! Privacy is tough for us though because it’s hard on our budget to do separate rooms (boy, 15, girl almost 13)…any suggetions appreciated!
Tonya @ The Traveling Praters
I love traveling with my three teens. I do agree, there can be moments that are less than pleasant, but then I’m sure they feel that way about me too. 🙂
One thing that works for my family is that we plan together. Everybody gets to choose one thing that they really want to do and we work that one thing in when at all possible. If we do something that they don’t like to do, they don’t get to complain because, after all, we may not all like their selection. Luckily, we’re all pretty laid back and go with the flow type personalities so there usually isn’t too much strife but on those days that they say “Why do we have to pan for gold?” I can reply “Because yesterday you chose Six Flags”. Nine times out of ten, they have a great time no matter what it is- even panning for gold. 🙂
The Time-Crunched Traveler (Ellen)
Great tips! Teenagers can be so unpredictable — but such fun 🙂
Steve
Electronics can be your friend…LOL. Amen! Of course, I should probably find some limits for the boy so he doesn’t miss another entire vacation. I think you’ve got a great set of tips here. If I ever manage to combine all five of those things in one trip, I’m pretty sure it would be a dream vacation.
Jessica
These are great tips, especially as my kids move into this stage.
Lisa Goodmurphy
You’re right – sleep is crucial and the biggest issue with teens is that they prefer to be up when everyone else is sleeping and sleeping when everyone else is up! I hate it when my teen sleeps over at a friend’s because she never gets enough sleep and then the rest of us pay for it the next few days. Fortunately, I have more control when we are traveling and she can’t stay up quite so late.
Lisa Goodmurphy
It’s definitely harder on the budget when the kids get older and more space becomes a necessity. We used to stay in nicer hotels and now I would rather have space than luxury!
My first suggestion would be to look into apartment rentals as I often find that it’s less expensive to rent than to pay for several nights of hotel accommodations plus there’s the extra value of having a kitchen for some meals, more space etc.
If renting doesn’t work out then there’s definitely a need for some creative solutions. We have a big age gap with our kids (15 and 8) and I’m guessing that it’s a bit different having two teenagers instead of just one.
If both of them need a break from parents then I would suggest letting them spend a bit of time sightseeing together but apart from you so that they feel like they have a bit of independence (with very clear rules established before they set out).
Needing a break from the entire family is harder in a standard hotel room. A balcony can provide some space for a teen to get away from his/her family for a bit of time. Another possibility would be letting a teen spend a bit of time just hanging out in the hotel room alone while the rest of the family does something nearby. When we were in Paris last month we left Katie at our apartment for an hour or so while the rest of us went to the puppet theatre in Luxembourg Gardens – she had not interest and just wanted a break from us so we let her stay behind.
Sometimes just putting in headphones and tuning out the rest of the family seems to help too – kind of creating a private space in the midst of chaos. 🙂
Just some initial thoughts – I’ll find out if anyone else has ideas.
Lisa Goodmurphy
I agree completely about planning activities. We try to do the same thing. I tell mine that being part of a family is all about compromise – sometimes you get to do what you want and sometimes you have to do what others want.
Lisa Goodmurphy
Thanks, Ellen! They are a lot like toddlers that way!! 🙂
Lisa Goodmurphy
Thanks, Steve – I knew that I could count on you to support me on the electronics front! I know a lot of people think you need to ban electronics on vacation but that would just cause an outright mutiny in our family!
Lisa Goodmurphy
Thanks, Jessica and Good Luck! Although from what I’ve seen girls can be a lot more moody as teenagers so you might have smooth sailing with four boys.
walkingon travels
Love it! I’ll be storing these tips for 14 years from now when my boys turn into teenagers. Thanks for linking up!
Andi at The Particular Traveler
I LOVE your tips, Lisa. I wish my parents had this list when I was a teen 🙂
Lisa Goodmurphy
Gosh – it’s hard to imagine your boys as teenagers but it will come far sooner than you would ever think! 🙂
Lisa Goodmurphy
Thanks, Andi!
Mary @ The world Is A Book
Such great tips that I am printing and saving as I’m entering the tween stage. Thank goodness they’re already bestfriends with their electronics =)
Lisa Goodmurphy
Thanks, Mary! With any luck yours won’t give you too much hassle! 🙂
Paula Liukko
Consultation is very important things to consider for a travelling,in Finland many are use to have some travel tips for them to know better that place they want to travel.