Yes, that's my teen-aged daughter, and no the photo is not posed. Our family spent the Canada Day long weekend at The Rosseau Muskoka, A JW Marriott Resort & Spa in one of the most picturesque regions of the country. The weather was absolutely perfect and the resort had an entire booklet of activities to choose from. So what did Katie want to do - swim, canoe, kayak, melt s'mores on an open fire pit? No, none of the above – she wanted to sit with her cellphone texting and playing on Facebook.
Teenagers are notorious for being frustrating travel companions. They can be worse than toddlers in foiling a parent's well-thought out vacation plans and their mood swings can rival any 2 year old's raging tantrum. It's honestly enough to drive most parents to throw in the towel and decide either not to go anywhere or to leave the teenagers at home. Parents who would like to continue to travel with their teen-aged children would be well advised to plan with their teen's needs and interests in mind, learn some coping strategies for dealing with teen behaviour and decide upfront how much freedom to give their teenagers in determining which family activities they are going to participate in on vacation.
Should I have made her leave the phone in our room? Maybe. But if I had she would have been miserable and would have made sure that everyone in her vicinity was miserable as well. She agreed to come to the beach with us if I let her bring the phone and I decided that I could live with that. We actually ended up having a very pleasant chat by the lake (she's very adept at multi-tasking) as we sat in the Muskoka chairs and watched my husband and younger daughter playing in the lake and kayaking. Parenting a teenager, either at home or on vacation, is all about picking your battles. Knowing that this was one that I couldn't win, I opted for a peaceful afternoon with my daughter even if it meant that others were wondering what kind of crazy mom lets her kid bring a cellphone to the beach.
Related Links
5 Tips for Traveling with a Teenager
Family Fun at the Rosseau Muskoka
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Wanderluster
“Pick you battles” – now there’s some hard-earned wisdom!
Sonja
Boy, can I relate to this. You really do have to choose your battles regarding electronics. I wish I could throw them all out the window.
Becca@rwetheryetmom?
I so needed to hear this – I have a pre-tween daughter and I need to pick my battles with her!!!
Thanks for sharing!
~Becca
Lisa@GoneWithTheFamily
I just defended myself on my Facebook page so I will add my comment here as well. Part of the reason that I gave in so easily was that we were dropping her off the next day at summer camp. Knowing that she had a week ahead jam-packed with activities made it seem not quite so bad that she didn’t want to participate in any activities at The Rosseau.
Jessica
You didn’t give in too easily, you made a choice that preserves your relationship. That’s a good mom in my book.
Lisa@GoneWithTheFamily
Thanks, Jessica – very kind of you to say so! 🙂
Bridget Smith
So wise…and you will treasure the talk just as much as you would the kayaking.
Lisa
Oh, boy. I SO get it. You just do your best, and make your best call day by day! That’s one cool thing about taking a kid to Europe–no cell phones! Here in the States, I usually just require no cell phones during meals and a couple of “cell free” hours in the afternoons…
Traci
This view is in my immediate future, with my 11-year old asking every day for a cell phone!
Lisa Wood
Oh wow – so we are not the only parents with a teenager who wont leave his phone alone! I am so glad that I came across your post via Facebook! I so wished I had read this a long time ago…we have a 17 1/2 year old boy, and his phone never ever leaves his hands. He even sleeps with it under his pillow, with his hands on it!
Funny enough his in the navy for training, and they take the phone Monday till Friday!! Not sure how he is coping, but I can so see him going to the lake and sitting there with his phone!
Thank you for sharing this great story – I like how you accepted that she wanted her phone while travelling to the lake!
Cheers
Lisa
Lisa Goodmurphy
I think it’s always reassuring for parents of teenagers to know that they aren’t the only ones dealing with certain behaviours. I’ve seen my daughter fall asleep with the phone in her bed too!
I expect your son is coping just fine since it’s not you that has taken his phone away! 🙂
Katherine Dale
I shared same experienced with you with my teen sister, she can stay whole day long in our house without going out as long as her cellphone is with her and her ipad. I don’t know what makes the new technology brought to a lot of teens today that made them very introvert. They just love to be alone, they don’t enjoy outing in the beach, but instead they love to stay and have fun their gadgets.